Ever since Kent posted about his Papa passing, I have been thinking about my grandpa even more than normal. I orginally made this video back for the first NaVloPoMo. In the video I said, “how can you sum up someone’s life in just a few minutes?”. I couldn’t do it then and I still can’t do it now. I mentioned the fishing, but it was way more than that. But the funny thing is, until I read Kent’s post, I never realized that I really never did “know” my grandpa. I mean I knew his name was Roy, I knew he had been married before he married my grandma (his first wife passed away). I knew he was my mom’s Dad, I knew he had 7 kids, that he worked hard, that he was in the Army in the 50’s. I knew he could play the guitar and the banjo. But most of all I knew that I always felt safe with him. And for me and my childhood, that was and still is a big deal. I love him with all my heart still to this day.
I love my paternal grandfather too, it’s just I was closer to grandpa Roy. I can’t even write this now without crying.
Now that I am a grandpa, I just want to be half the grandpa he was to me to Jaymisen (and hopefully other grand babies as well, but not anytime soon…Married and stable for the kids would be nice). I always want Jaymisen to feel safe with me, to feel loved. I want him to know in every fiber of his being that I love and adore him. Last night Jaymisen came up to me as I was in the chair and he placed his head on my arm and he said “love you”….you can ask Glenna, I thought I was hearing things but she heard it too. My grandpa loved me, I know he did but I don’t know if he really ever knew how much he meant to me. I mean I told him I love him, hundreds of time and I know that I meant it. I just wish I could tell him how he made me feel and how he still does and how I want to be the love to my grandson like he was to me
I never ask you guys to do anything, but if I could impose on you all just once, it would be to simply call someone who means a lot to you, someone you have never told. Tell them what you feel, because you don’t know what the next day will bring.